Help Your Angry Child N.O.W.
Help Your Angry Child N.O.W.
Earlier today, I spoke with Dr. Robyn Silverman about helping angry kids. The podcast will be shared in the near future and I'll be sure to share a link, once it's available. Helping angry kids has been a topic that has been a perennial favorite with the Kidlutions' readership over many years.
In the past, we've talked here about the importance of making feelings a part of daily conversation in your home, by doing such things as reading books that demonstrate how to deal with feelings, keeping a family feelings journal, as well as helping kids learn how to identify and label feelings (the research is clear on how this helps!)
Easy Work of Tough Stuff
While I was preparing for the interview, I came up with the acronym N.O.W., to help adults better help angry kids. Those of you who know me well, know I love to make things easy to remember... it's something I've done since I was a kid in elementary school, to remember big concepts. Mnemonic devices. They just make life easier.
You can help your angry child by remembering three simple steps!
The NOW stands for:
NORMALIZE the feeling of anger. We want to tell kids: “All feelings are okay, it’s what you do with them that counts. Everybody gets angry. It’s okay to be mad, it’s not okay to hurt anyone or ourselves when we are angry.” Here's a FREE printable that can help drive this point home with your kids!
OFFER options or strategies that help kids cool down their anger. First, start off by inviting kids to identify what might be most helpful. As we've talked about before, encouraging kids to identify their own strategies or interventions can be super helpful. If a child is stumped or reluctant, provide ideas and let the child decide on a few that might be helpful to them.
WORK with your child on managing BIG feelings. We might tell our kids, “I’m here for you, you can ask for my help whenever you need it!” When we are able to stop personalizing our child's behavior and instead, see it as a plea for help, we can be much more effective at helping them navigate challenging and overwhelming feelings. Try it and see.
We'd love to hear how these ideas work in your home, classroom or therapy office! Reach out and let us know! Tell us on our facebook, twitter, pinterest or instagram accounts! We'd love to interact with you there!
Get our FREE Anger Toolbox for Kids
If you're new around these parts, and you're trying to help your angry child, be sure to sign up for our Anger Toolbox for Kids, which is a FREE downloadable MP3 (45 minutes long), as well as printables and activities that can begin to help you help your child! Click the image below, or go HERE!
Wendy Young, LMSW, BCD, is the founder of Kidlutions and co-author of BLOOM: 50 Things to Say, Think and Do with Anxious, Angry and Over-the-Top Kids. She is the creator of numerous workbooks and resources to help from the preschool through the teen years. Follow her on Pinterest, Instagram, Twitter and Facebook! She'd love to see your smiling face there! Affiliate links may be used in this post. Please see our full disclaimer, located at the top of our page for more information.